Management reconstruction.

So now IGNYTE closes cell and FUEL. Lack of leaders and management problems. I hope they can restructure the system soon. I would like to give my inputs:

The current management problems I see:

1. The leaders are too sticky to each other, new leaders are not able to blend well.
2. Top management keep moving around, either out of IGNYTE or go further up too fast. 
3. Criteria of a good leader is consistent but the criteria to be a leader in IGNYTE is compromised. I’m surprised at how some young leaders can become leaders when they don’t seem ready for it. Reasons? I am not sure but I feel that they have not been fully assessed properly by the management.
4. Knowledge and skills of the leaders are not enough. E.g Bible knowledge, social skills and ability to influence.
5. There may be a trend of youths not ready to commit to IGNYTE as a leader?
6. Maybe we need to promote leadership in IGNYTE? How can we do it?
7. The worship and tech ministries do not seem to be able to allow worship to flow properly. I have heard comments, the sounds’ bad, the music can’t sync properly. It can be quite distracting.

Suggestions of solutions for the current management:

1. Leaders, break out from your cosy cluster! Like the army says, “don’t cluster **** there! You will block the way and cause chaos!”
2. Stop “referring” people to be leaders just because they are your close friend and they behave like you. You get no referral fees! It does not mean you are a good leader, means your close friend who behaves like you is a good leader. Have you heard of an evil twin?
3. Let’s revise the standards we have for leaders. It’s getting more like a Wall street rating agency, which just rates the wrong standards! Let’s be impartial and real when it comes to the management of lives.
4. Equip the leaders with the right skills. Social skills? Simple common sense skills like making friends with people we do not know. Understanding the dynamics of your team and the culture that is to be set for them. e.g. Your team members are all shy to talk with one another. Bonding is required! The skill to present oneself – Confidence courses?
5. The top management can’t always keep changing, we are not a listed company where shares keep changing owners. We need to have a stable top management that can push IGNYTE beyond a milestone before changes can be made. Personally I’m lost about the leadership, there seem to be a blur vision on exactly who’s in charge of what?
6. The worship team needs to work on their standards on the platform. I understand they are not a performing band but trust me, by performing well, it realy brings people to worship. Try playing just the guitar every week and you see a drop in attendence. Let’s face it, today’s era, youths are looking at more than just a hymn, its a package. We can’t fight it, we should use it to our advantage instead.

After giving some inputs, I would like to say this are my honest opinions. Correct me if I am wrong, please.

Seriously, let’s discuss.

Suddenly, I feel so unsatisfied in my heart. I just feel like I can’t get satisfied and am filled with great frustration! It’s that heart wrenching, gut tightening and stomach rolling feel. I really do not know what I truly want. My heart just cannot be satisfied. I just keep wanting better of everything. My heart is searching for the true fulfillment. Don’t tell me “you need GOD” kinda bullshit.

Let’s be real and transparent, we are not born to love Jesus instantly. I once loved GOD like never before but as I grow up, things and circumstances in life have changed my perspective. We need to be real and not just literally think GOD is in control. I decided to take fuller control of my life than left it hanging out. I can never understand how the IGNYTE can assume AF will do well in its system.

After being in IGNYTE for 4 and a half years, I have observed and did some study into IGNYTE’s system:

When IGNYTE first started out, it was a good system. The branding and marketing strategies were in place and are able to reach out and convince it’s target group well. The leadership/Management structure was good and there was a hierachy that things can move smooth in each step.

Howeever, as IGNYTE grows in numbers, the management is not able to handle the changes and yet implemented new policies and reconstruction to it’s structure. Slowly, I see that the regulars start to lose interest and even start to break further from the ministries. In IGNYTE, there are several arms of ministries that are “serving platforms” for youths and leaders which build the foundations of this entire IGNYTE system/organisation.  I realise that people are just joining these paltforms like a hobby and pastime than a serious pursue to be part of that serving ministry for GOD.

E.g. Tech Team. There are a large numbers of youths in the ministry. How many are actually trained to handle the tasks at hand? I understand 50% of it require OJT. What about the other 50%?  The other 50% requires the indivudual to go do self-study, research and indulge in personal hands-on outside serving times. For example, Sound. I became an audiophile to understand the importance of good sound to to further my knowledge and skills in discerning and creating good sound. Some of these youths are not even trying to spend time and commit to further indulge in the skills required in their own time. Blame the kids, their parents or the leaders? Let’s not say blame, what about who’s responsibility to educate the kids in these values?

All these values are applicable to the other ministries and in their future endeavours.

AF is a platoon of Men that are either serving their national obligations or are regulars in the force like me. Looking at how our platoon operates, we cannot fit into the system like IGNYTE. We require a more stable and mature system that allow us to anchor ourselves in it. Our platoon are guys that are rapidly growing in thier values and focus in life. National Service is a place where Men are transformed either negatively or positively. As such, a stable and mature system with experienced and deidcated structure is needed to ensure that these men standing on the double edged sword do not fall to the left or right.

Further elaborations for AF:

TENET and Cell topics. They do not interest me at all. Why? Too shallow. I see my fellow AFs dozing off or look really distracted or bored during TENET and sermons. The knowledge taught to us AF is not going make us grow or even maintain our relationship with GOD. It is too shallow for us, let alone applicable. We are growing adults compared to the youths in IGNYTE.

What AF needs is real practical knowledge like the adults have. About the next step in life: Career? Relationship building – beyond dating please? e.g. marriage, housing, fiancial planning and management? Sex Education? Clubbing, drinking, flirting? Office Politics? Deeper Bible references?

We do not need to be taught that men want to be heroes and women want to be damsels. Let’s face this, men want to be successful in their careers, women want to marry that rich man. Looking at the young adults, that’s what I see from the men and women. So how to deal with it? Teach us that please, not about opening doors for the girls and dressing appropriately for men.

The world is around us and we are definitely influenced by it one way or another. Men want luxury cars, women put on fake lashes and thick make-up. We see them in church and everywhere everytime. So let’s be truthful of who we are and not just say we cant do this we can’t do that. Seriously, let’s discuss.

You application has been successful.

Woohoo! My application got accepted by SIM! Thank GOD! Now, one burden off my shoulders.

Anyway, screw SMU and NTU.

Chief Finance Officer.

I felt a glimpse of hope from SIM as they gave me a fee protection insurance. I wonder if it means they want me or they just do it for every applicant? In any case, finance is the way I want to go. My girlfriend has provoked my thinking and broaden my perspective of the finance industry. It will be challenging, humility-provoking and stamina draining. We all know, how malicious the finance industry is, yet I naively want to aim high – Chief Fianace Officer of a financial institution.

My dream and goals for each phase will be hindered by crazy people or circumstances that I cannot control. But it is how I weave my road to Damascus through with careful tactics and gurading my heart from falling with the malice.

So, let’s see if UOL accepts me then.

Longing for her.

It’s the start of the new week and I’m having a not-so-nice start. I have got to go Gedong for some NDP screen stuff, gonna rot there for hours though. And guess how interesting is Gedong?

Nicole is going for a short trip with her friends over the weekend. So happen that this is the only weekend I’m free after 3 weeks! Argh… Imagine the feeling, so wanted to spend time with her, but she is unable to meet me, not even sms! I am feeling rather lonely now, thinking about what is to come for the week makes me really sad and lonely. I do not know how long I can last with this loneliness. This loneliness comes from the fact that all my friends are going to ORD and being left alone, with my Nicole not gonna be around…

I saw some nice pictures on facebook just now. Some of my friends who went Taiwan for exercise Starlight as an ORD trip! Man! How I wish I too can go with them, and also shouting out loud ORD-loh!!! However, reality still prevails, I can only envy and watch from a distance.

I want to ORD!

All my fellow YSLs ORDing soon, like in 2 weeks’ time! I will be still stuck here in the army till June 2012. It isn’t a good feeling at all. I feel lonely here, no one as my good companion. I hate loneliness the most, I rather have a tough time with my friends alongside than to slack alone all day.

Honestly, one part of me is regretting that I signed on. Though the contract is short, but the season is really tough on me. I still do not know whether my plans for part time studies is going to work out or not. I’m hoping desperately and praying fervently for God’s favour and blessings to be on me. If I can go for my part time studies, it will be awesome! Then my first step to success is completed!

On the other hand, I enjoy the good pay and schedule here, though not completely, but it’s better than alot of private and even some public sector organisations. All I just want is to study finance and work my way to be a Chief Finance Officer in an organisation!

Car accident of the year.

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon, all I wanted was to enjoy a good brunch with Nicole at Kovan when we met an accident along Hougang Ave 1.

This is how it happened:

I was turning right into Hougang Ave 1 street. Keeping in my lane, an uncle, driving a Renault Kangroo was also turning into Hougang Ave 1 from the opposite direction. He did not stick into his lane when turning and without even signalling, he tried to cut into my lane. He horned big time at me big time and E-braked. I just carried on driving. Looking at the mirror, I saw him gesturing viciously at me behind. When he changed lane to look over, I pointed the finger at him, he suddenly cut into my lane and caused me to hit his van.

He immediately came down,using his cholesterol-loaded belly to press against my door, refusing to let me down the car. Using vulgarities at me, insulting my driving skills, just because I am a P-plate. He and his fugly daughter keep hurling vulgarities and insults at Nicole. I felt like punching him and that fugler. Remembering I am a SAF personnel, I need to be composed.

He dared me to call the police, thinking I would not dare to call, I did. Seeing that I already called the police, he wanted to leave, I was pissed and dared him to stay and settle with the police. He still left, did not have the guts to stay.

I have never been so angry and frustrated till then. I was in great agony as I could not get back at him immediately. Worst thing, my front bumper dent quite badly, while his was jus a deep scratch! (Don’t buy japanese cars unless you are a safe driver!)

I realised that in life, we will lose badly at times, but is how we learn and step out of it happily. I am still trying to let go of the unforgiveness I have against that fella. Now I know, I must be more humble even when I lose.